Setting Boundaries Doesn't Make You Less Caring - It Helps You Stay in the Profession
One of the things I think is incredibly important in any helping profession—especially in social work and Aging Life Care—is taking care of yourself.
This type of work can easily burn someone out.
I love what I do, and I am passionate about working with older adults. I would like to stay in this field for my entire career, if I can. That means I don't want to burn out or push myself so hard that I no longer have the empathy, support, patience, and care to give to my clients (and yes, sometimes their challenging family members).
Part of avoiding burnout involves setting really good boundaries—both when it comes to taking care of yourself and when it comes to working with clients.
You Teach Clients How to Work With You
One of the best pieces of advice I can give to new care managers or social workers is this:
You teach clients how to work with you.
It is actually better to be a little stricter with your boundaries in the beginning so clients learn the best ways to work with you.
For me, that means business hours are Monday through Friday, from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.
Here's why that matters.
If you send emails on Saturday mornings, clients will naturally assume you work on Saturday mornings.
If you call someone back at 7:00 p.m., they'll often expect you'll answer the phone the next time they call at 7:00 p.m.
Without realizing it, you've taught them that you're available outside of your normal work hours.
That doesn't mean you aren't caring. It simply means you're preserving yourself and your ability to continue taking great care of your clients and their families.
The healthier your boundaries are, the longer you'll be able to do this work well.
Some Clients Will Push Your Boundaries
There will always be some clients who push your boundaries.
Sometimes they're dealing with overwhelming circumstances. Sometimes they have poor coping skills or long-standing challenges with interacting with other people.
Those situations require compassion—but they also require healthy limits.
One particularly challenging client can push a care manager to the edge of no longer wanting to work in this field.
It happens.
In fact, the burnout rate in social services continues to hover around 50%, which is an astounding statistic and a reminder of just how important healthy boundaries really are.
Setting boundaries isn't about caring less.
It's about making sure you can continue caring for the hundreds of clients you'll serve throughout your career—not just the one in front of you today.
One Habit That Helps Me Every Week
One habit that I encourage staff members and colleagues to develop is keeping a WIN List.
At the end of every week, write down at least three wins from your work.
They don't have to be huge accomplishments. They just have to remind you of the difference you made.
For example:
I helped someone move into assisted living.
Gail decided she's ready for a stair lift.
I completed all of my visit notes within 48 hours this week.
I helped Bob pass away with peace and dignity.
I find this incredibly helpful because it reminds me that I accomplished a lot this week—even if I still have 28 things waiting on next week's to-do list.
In our profession, there's always another phone call to make, another family meeting, another crisis, another form to complete.
It's easy to focus on everything that's left to do.
The WIN List reminds me to stop and recognize what I did accomplish.
A Final Thought
If you're new to this field—or even if you've been doing this work for years—remember that setting boundaries isn't selfish. It's part of being a good social worker and a good Aging Life Care Professional.
Healthy boundaries allow you to continue showing up with empathy, patience, and compassion for the people who need you most.
This week, I encourage you to think about one boundary you could strengthen. Maybe it's waiting until Monday morning to answer non-urgent emails. Maybe it's turning off work notifications after hours. Or maybe it's simply taking five minutes every Friday to write down your three wins.
Your clients deserve your best—and taking care of yourself is one of the best ways to make sure you can continue giving them exactly that.